I am sure those readers unfamiliar with life in the Army might wonder what the above title is about. ‘Olive Green’ is the color of the uniform worn by the Indian Army.

It is said that when you marry into the Army you join not an individual but an extended family that wears olive green, a family where there is total fraternity and complete sharing of moments of joy and sorrow.

I have been wedded to the olive green for the past 27 years and despite many trials and anxieties which a person in civil street would never face or comprehend, I can say with confidence that it has been a wonderful experience, a life full of adventure and camaraderie. I found that the Army was not a profession but a way of life. Everyone followed a very strict code of conduct. There was a fixed way of doing things – be it serving a cup of tea, meals at home, way of dressing, being introduced, what to say and what not to, how to sit at a table, how to converse with senior officers–the list was endless. Though the canvas of learning was enormous it took no time at all to paint because other ladies considered it their responsibility to teach me ‘the ways’.

Though married life in the army appears glamorous to outsiders we have our problems and anxieties, which only the Army wives understand. Generally after a span of two years one has to pack up and move to a new place. During transit it is not uncommon to break your precious dinner set or all your crystal. When posted to remote areas one has to occupy make-shift accommodation at times a hut commonly known as a ‘Basha’, which has mud walls and a thatched roof where one learns that when a snake falls from the roof or you find a jackal in your toilet, its part of the deal. Children have to study in make shift schools where besides yourself and a few other wives, there are no teachers. Children face the trauma of frequent changes of schools and making new friends.

Yet another challenge is loneliness. I missed familiar surroundings and family functions. I yearned for my husband’s presence during extended duties away from home, which are frequent and at times at short notice, often starting a day before a planned holiday! Many an Army wife was a career woman before marriage but she soon realizes that she may never be able to pursue one because of frequent transfers.

However Army life compensated me in many ways for all that I may have missed in civil society. As an Army spouse, apart from shouldering my unique responsibilities towards the family, I had a decided role to play in my husband’s career. Women are born managers, why else would nature entrust them with the role of child rearing and home making?

An officer’s wife is indeed a true manager. Besides managing her home she visits Army hospitals, runs welfare and vocational training centres, and teaches the jawan’s wives about legal rights and counsels them. In times of war or sudden move of troops, the responsibility to look after the needs of the soldiers’ family falls on her shoulders. She acts as a friend, philosopher and guide and provides solace to them till the return of their husbands. The experience is unique and the satisfaction is tremendous.

Marriage into the Army life has made me strong, independent and persevering. How else would I have managed to keep my cool when my husband was shot at and grievously injured while combating insurgency, the many years I have had to stay alone, helping my daughters to go through 9 to 10 schools till matriculation and in the bargain learning Sanskrit so that I could teach my daughter?

After 27 years and two children, I feel I have emerged a happier, stronger and better person. Following short spells of bad weather, the rainbow has always appeared. It is in giving and not in keeping that one actually receives. All this has made my married life more meaningful and wholesome.

Cecilia Kelson
(Cecilia is the wife of Maj. Gen. B. W. Kelson,VSM, a former Director of INI, Pune. They have maintained close contact with IofC and have participated in many programmes. Cecilia is a graduate from St. Xaviers, Ahmedabad and after her B.Ed taught for a few years before marriage.)