Before becoming a parent my ideas and feelings towards children were very glamorous; but when I became a parent the whole concept of parenting took on a new meaning and new understanding for me.

"I enjoy being with my children when they are feeling lonely, low, bad or angry towards the world."

In order to help my children develop their character I learnt the art of communication. And in the process of parenting, my children actually became my teachers.

My elder son has special needs and to create a supportive environment at home and at school was a great struggle for me. Because of his behavioral problems and hyperactive nature I often experienced feelings of failure, guilt, shame and suffocation, but it made me stronger and more positive towards my child’s needs.

Because I am a teacher, society has high expectations of my children’s development. All the time my elder son was being referred to as ‘madam’s son’ and many a time that has reduced me to tears.

At times I have felt that even family members have not been able to accept my son. Generally we take pride in our children. We like talented, intelligent children who can perform for us. But when children are unable to live up to our expectations we reject them. I have realised that if we are not able to accept our children as they are, we have no right to grumble about them or to put responsibility on others.

The feeling of loneliness, the complete emptiness, helped me in concentrating more and every difficulty has strengthened my capacity for problem solving and being more positive towards life. I enjoy being with my children when they are feeling lonely, low, bad or angry towards the world.

Rekha Shah
Principal, Mira the Happy School, Vadodara